


Dear Prat,

by SuperTeenWizard



Category: Arthurian Mythology & Related Fandoms, Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Era, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gen, Love, Love Confessions, Love Letters, M/M, Magic, Magic Revealed, Mute Merlin, Muteness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-03-11
Packaged: 2018-05-23 16:58:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6123283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperTeenWizard/pseuds/SuperTeenWizard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin goes to Camelot in the hopes that Gaius will teach him about his magic and that he might finally fit in. But instead he ends up working for (and falling in love with) the Prince.<br/>He writes a letter to Arthur to confess about two things: His magic and His love.</p><p>Enjoy!!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

When Merlin saw the blond prat teasing one of the castle servants he couldn't just stand by and watch.  
Which is why he went over to help. What he hadn't realised when he went over was that the blond prat had been the king's son, namely, Prince Arthur of Camelot. And Prince Arthur of Camelot apparently wasn't the most forgiving and reasonable of princes (Merlin conclude this as he sat in a dark, damp cell later that day after being thrown into it with strict orders to 'remember his place' and that 'just because he was mute didn't mean he would get special treatment').

~*~

  
A few days after the incident with the (royal) blond prat  - during which Merlin found the man he had been supposed to meet yesterday (his uncle in all but blood, according to his mother: Gaius), accidently revealed himself as magic to said uncle (it wasn't like he could've just let the man fall to his death) and then been subsequently ranted at for aforementioned 'carelessness with his magic' (and begrudgingly thanked) - Merlin found himself in the reluctant position of saving the princes life.  
Which lead to him being in the even more reluctant position of 'manservant to the prince' (which was apparently a reward. Merlin didn't really understand the minds of royalty).  
Gaius tried to protest (as being that close to Arthur Pendragon and his father wasn't exactly where a warlock wanted to be whilst in Camelot. Unless of course they were an evil warlock, but that was something Merlin was most certainly _not)_ by pointing out Merlin was mute and the position might be better given to someone else, but the kings mind was made.  
According to him 'the boys muteness will almost be a positive as he can't talk back' (both Gaius and Arthur internally snorted at this, as they both had personal experience that contradicted that).

~*~

And thus began the strangest (but also greatest) times of Merlin's life.  
Arthur was just as much a prat as he had seemed at first, but there was also more to him than that. He was brave, strong,  loyal and (at times) also kind, generous and noble.  
As time went on Merlin found himself more and more drawn to the man, and saw his potential to be a truly great king.  
And, on top of that, Arthur seemed to intrinsically understand Merlin. When others would just stare in confusion as Merlin attempted to mime what he was trying to say, Arthur would just answer accordingly.  
It got to the point where they would have whole conversations without Merlin uttering a word (seeing as he physically couldn't) or writing anything down (as he often had to do to communicate with others). Arthur often acted as a sort of interpreter between Merlin and others, which made the young warlocks life infinitely easier.  
This made the two men practically inseparable. Merlin stayed by Arthur's side much more than being his manservant would necessarily warrant, because he much preferred it to being alone or trying (unsuccessfully) to talk to other servants. And Arthur didn't mind. He enjoyed having someone to banter with. Merlin was the closest thing he had to a friend (something he had never before actually had). Not that he would ever admit it. If anyone actually asked, Merlin was just his 'incompetent manservant'.  
The other benefit for Merlin of staying with Arthur as much as possible was that he also became quite good friends with some of the knights. Since he accompanied Arthur on all the quests and hunting trips Merlin was quite often in the presence of Percival, Elyan, Lancelot, Gwaine and Leon and quickly became the sort of comic relief of the group.  
They all were very protective of Merlin and if anyone ever spoke against or bullied him they answered to the knights (not that if happened all that often; Merlin was a hard person to dislike as he always had a blinding smile on his face). But, although they were all good friends, none of them came even close to understanding Merlin like Arthur did.

~*~

  
But things weren't all fun and games in Camelot for Merlin. He had met a dragon in his first few days of being in Camelot who spoke of things like 'Emrys' and 'The Once and Future King' and 'Destiny'. And, to Merlin's great annoyance, it had turned out the dragon hadn't just been a crazy overgrown lizard talking craziness.  
Over the years Merlin found himself in increasingly dangerous situations because of his pratty prince and so-called destiny. He was betrayed by friends, fought evil monsters, killed people, offered his life, met his father and then lost his father that same day, gained the powers of a dragon lord, banished the great dragon, broke love potions, protected a friend, watched friends die, saw prophecies and so, so much more.  
So much happened to him that sometimes it got too much, he often felt as though he would collapse under the weight of expectations and destiny and secrets and lies and the constant façade of a smiling face and careless jokes.  
He sometimes had to turn into a deserted alcove on his way to collect Arthur's luncheon to just _breathe,_ he would sometimes struggle to get up in the morning because it was all just _too much_ , he would come back from having killed some grief-stricken revenge-bent magic user and he would feel himself drowning in the guilt and fear and deception, unable to move or _breathe_ he would fall to the ground sobbing and wake up, feeling more tired then when he'd fallen asleep, on the ground of the forest with maple leaves clutched in his hand and his face wet with tears and dew and he would wish he could all just stop.  
But then he would remember what it was all for. He would remember that, although Arthur would never admit it, he was _needed_ and cared for. He would remember the way Arthur looked when he woke up, the child like way he would rub his eyes and yawn. He would remember the way Arthur's skin looked drenched in sweat from a hard training session and glistening in the light of the summer sun. He would remember how Arthur's smile looked directed at him, the one that said he was truly happy and at peace. He would remember the way Arthur hair felt running through his fingers as he bathed the man. He would remember Arthur could see an expression on his face and hear a thousand words.  
He would remember how Gwen would always find something to complement in anyone (even of she was extremely awkward about it); how Gwaine's laugh sounded after a drink or two with the other knights; how Gaius was always ready with a word of advice or information; how Lancelot was always there for him with a polite smile and reassuring hand on the shoulder; how Camelot looked in the winter with a light dusting of snow along the rooves; how the surrounding forest smelt in the spring.  
And it would be okay. _He_ would be okay. For a while he would be able to live with the weight bearing down on him. He would even forget it at times. He would be _happy,_ and the smiles wouldn't be fake and he would bask in the fact that he was _alive_ and so was Arthur and that everything was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this. Kudos and comments/constructive criticism are greatly appreciated.  
> Thanks so much for reading!! <3


	2. The Letter

Merlin took a deep breath before raising his hand to the heavy wooden door, a feeling of dread pooling in his gut and making sweat break out on his skin. He knocked on the door for probably the first time in his life, and went inside at the call of “enter”.

He pushed the door open and forced his usual cheeky grin onto his face, the hand holding the letter goes behind his back. Arthur was sitting at his desk looking down at the document in his hand with an expression of bemusement and something that looked like thinly veiled disgust. If Merlin weren’t so nervous he would’ve asked what Arthur was reading. But not today, today he just went over and sat on the free chair.

Arthur, seeing just how off his manservant seemed, bit off the sarcastic remark his had been about to mutter and instead put the papers in his hand down onto the desk, forgotten. “Merlin?” he asked, not even bothering to disguise the worry in his voice, “Merlin, what is it? Are you okay, is it Hunith?”

In answer, Merlin shakily placed the letter onto the desk in front of Arthur. The first page was just a few paragraphs, which Arthur quickly read.

 

_Before I tell you what this is all about, I want you to promise that you won’t make any decisions or judgements until you finish the whole letter; I promise I won’t run away or anything, I will just be in my room until you want to talk to me or find me, so you don’t need to hurry._

_Now, you’re probably even more confused than before. Sorry._

_Also, before you read this I want to point out that everything you know about me and everything we’ve done together was the truth and is real. Please, when you finish this I know that you will think that I must’ve been lying to you about everything, but I promise, I wasn’t._

_I’ll just leave it at that for now, you can read the actual letter if you want._

Arthur glanced up at Merlin questioningly, “I promise,” he told Merlin, who just nodded gratefully then got up, gave Arthur a feeble smile and left the room. His back was hunched and he clutched at his stomach but he knew he had done the right thing, Arthur’s coronation had been yesterday, and there were no more reasons for Merlin to keep his secrets anymore.

 

Arthur stared at the recently closed door for a second, and new that whatever was written in these pages would change his view of Merlin forever. The thought made Arthur want to throw the letter in the fire and pretend none of this had ever happened, but he knew he couldn’t. Whatever this was about, Merlin wanted him to know, so he would read it. He had to.

The king picked up the letter and turned it over, revealing the slightly messy handwriting that was so familiar to him. Every time he saw this writing he would learn something new about his best friend, and it seemed that this was to be no exception.

 

_Dear ~~Prat~~ Arthur,_

_I have two things that I need to tell you, both of which you may hate me for._

_Shit._

_I have kept these both to myself for so long and it scares the hell out of me to be finaly telling you this, but I feel as though this is long overdue. You need to know but I also need to tell you for me. These things have been pulling me apart from the seams and it has been killing me lying to you. So I’m going to tell you._

_Please don’t hate me??_

_I’ll start with the one less likely to get me killed. I hope._

_Right, I have no simple way of putting this so I’m just going to say it._

_Just three little words._

_Shit, shit, shit. Oh god, I’m shaking._

_I love you._

_(You don’t know how good it feels to finally get that out. I’ve never really told anyone and now...    ..I feel like I can finally_ breathe _)_

_Now that I think about it, you’ve probably noticed this already – I can’t be a subtle as I think I am – but there it is. Now you know for sure._

_I love you._

_And, just to clarify (because you are a thick clotpole), I don’t mean that in the ‘you are my best friend and I would die for you’ (although, as you know, I most certainly_ would _die for you) way. I mean it in the ‘I would greatly appreciate it if you fucked me into your mattress and then cuddled with me afterwards’ way._

_Damnit; now I’m thinking about you buggering me. Not that is an especially rare occurrence._

_......Anyway_

_Forget I said that._

_What I am not so eloquently trying to say is that I love you more than I have ever loved (or ever could love) anyone, any_ thing _, else in the world._

_You complete me Arthur Pendragon. (I’m NOT a girl)_

_Without you my life would be , meaningless. No, it would be hell; it would be the worst kind of torture imaginable and I am going to stop thinking about this right now or else I will start getting nightmares again._

_You are everything to me, Arthur. Even though of of the time you are a prat and a cabbagehead (Still a real word) you are also kind and brave and noble and selfless (and the fact that you are gorgeous doesn’t really hurt either) and who could stop themselves from falling in love with you?_

_(and I really need to stop stroking your ego....ugh, this is going o make you unbearable)_

_I know that you almost certainly don’t feel the same way (I can hope though, can’t I) but, like I said before, I needed to tell you._

_You need to know that you are laved and, even though you aren’t completely perfect (no one is), you will be a fantastic king (the best) but also, more importantly, a great man (also the best)._

_And I will stay by your side for as long as you let me (and probably longer than that too)._

_So, if you don’t feel the same way, please don’t shut me out, I give you my full permission to just ignore my feelings and carry on as normal. I will forever be your friend (however I may wish for something more) and I will always be there for you._

_Now, onto the second thing._

_Oh crap._

_I would greatly appreciate it if you didn’t kill me for this. ...Just saying._

_I think the easiest way to say this would be like last time._

_Just three little words._

_I have magic._

_No, that’s not right. I AM magic._

_I was born with it. Mother says I was floating objects around the room before I could even walk._

_Before I explain anything else there is something I need you to understand: Magic is not inherently evil._

_It is a tool which can be wielded with a good or bad intent. There are evil sorcerers because there are bad people, not because magic is evil and corrupts them._

_There are bad knights, but that doesn’t mean every knight should be killed._

_My magic is like your sword. They can both kill people, can both take lives, but only if we, as people, wish for them to do so._

_As well as that, magic can not only take lives but can also save them, protect them (as I have done yours), in so many more ways than a sword or any other non-magical tool ever could._

_Magic can heal wounds and bring people back from the brink of death, ca make flowers bloom and fields more fertile, can light up the darkness with a few words, can ignite a fire or put it out in seconds, can be used to finish everyday tasks that would be done in hours in minutes, can do so, so much_ good _._

_Magic can be utterly beautiful, if you would only give it a chance._

_The only reason Camelot is so prejudiced against it is because your mother died giving birth to you and it destroyed Uther. Is it really fair that one sorceress should represent them all? Us all?_

_I am not saying that your father was a bad king, he did what he thought was the best for the kingdom and for the best part made good choices for Camelot, but in the case of magic he was wrong and unjust._

_There is a prophecy about us._

_The druids and the Great Dragon (Kilgara) have both told me of it. They call me Emrys, the greatest sorcerer of our time (even though I am, technically, a warlock), and it is my destiny to serve you, The Once and Future King._

_You are destined to be the greatest king to ever live and to unite the whole of Albion. And I am supposed to help you with that destiny, as well as introducing magic back to the land._

_It is my destiny to stand by you and protect you (Although, as I said before, I wouldn’t need a destiny to do that. I would stay by your side forever out of love anyway). And I have done just that._

_I have saved your life more times than I can count. All those bandits who seem to die out of coincidence (falling tree branches are my specialty), The Great Dragon (although I didn’t actually kill him, I just sent him away. But I know it will work because I am a Dragonlord and he has to obey any command I give him. Balinor was my father, I only found out a day or so before we set out to find him and I inherited his powers when he died), the Dorocha, the Questing Beast (I can tell you more about that later if you want to know more), the sorcerer Sigan (and just about every other sorcerer who has ever attacked Camelot or you), Valiant (although you know some of that), all the love potions/spells you (or your father)have ever been under. Those are just the few I can think of off the top of my head._

_Essentially my life since coming to Camelot has comprised of finding out something is trying to kill you, researching it, discretely using magic to kill it, someone else tasking credit and then finding out something else is trying to kill you (interspersed with doing chores for you and Gaius)._

_This is really just the basics and there are probably still a lot of things of things you don’t know about but I think I’ll end this here. I’ve written all I really need to and the rest can be discussed face to face if we ever get a chance._

_My heart, my body, my magic, my very_ soul _is yours to command Arthur Pendragon, to do with as you see fit._

_With all of my love and loyalty,_

_Merlin._

Roughly half a candle mark later, a maid came to fetch Merlin from his room.

Merlin trudged up the worn stone staircase he had travelled thousands of times with a sense of trepidation engulfing him. But it felt muted in a way. He had been a strange mix of terrified and relieved as he wrote and handed the letter to Arthur, but now the feelings felt far away.

What ever happened now was up to Arthur, whatever the verdict; Merlin would do as Arthur bid him. As he had said in the letter: he was _Arthur’s_. And nothing would change that. Even if today were to be his last.

After what seemed like an eternity and also, paradoxically, no time at all, Merlin was once again standing in front of a heavy wooden door, raising his hand to knock.

Arthur called for him to enter and, gathering his strength and emotions, he did.

The room was darker than it had been, the setting sun painting the light walls a soft peachy colour.

Arthur looked up at him and the sun highlighted his cheekbones and contrasted his eyes so perfectly that it made him look like an angel or a God in the way that never ceased to make Merlin's heart clench in awe and love and need.

Merlin slowly shut the door behind him and walked into the room feeling barer than he ever had before. He had no more secrets from Arthur and whilst that was terrifying it was also the best feeling Merlin had ever experienced.

Arthur got up from his seat in the same way Merlin had seen him move around young animals (like he was about to bolt any second and needed reassuring) or ones he was about to kill. Merlin just hoped it wasn’t the latter this time.

Arthur kept walking closer, until Merlin could see each speck of blue in his eyes and the scar above his left eye he had gotten a couple of years ago. Arthur searched his eyes intently, unabashedly, as though seeking the answer to question, and all that Merlin could think was that for the first time in his life he was glad he was mute, or else he would’ve ruined this moment instantly, with some unchecked rambling.

Then, just as Merlin had been about to raise a questioning eyebrow, Arthur pulled Merlin passionately into his arms and buried his face in his hair, Letting out a heavy breath that sound suspiciously teary, “I love you too, Merlin,” Arthur all but growled into Merlin's ear, and All of the tension seeped out of him into the stones of the castle. “I love you so much. But don’t think that doesn’t mean I’m not angry at you,”

Merlin nodded earnestly into Arthur’s neck, barely managing to keep the tears of relief in his eyes (he didn’t need to give Arthur any more ammunition for calling him a girl). “You have lied to me for so long, and I understand why you did, but that doesn’t mean I’m not hurt by it. But right now all I can think about is the first half of that letter and how relieved I am.”

They stood like that in the middle of Arthur’s chambers until the sun had fully set and the only light coming through the window was that of the moon. Arthur was the one to pull back, but he didn’t go far just pulled his head out of Merlin's hair and instead resting it against Merlin’s forehead. Knowing that Arthur wouldn’t be the one to make the first move, Merlin tilted his head downwards slightly, until they were exchanging breaths, and then, in one swift swoop, pushed his lips against Arthur’s.

He wasn’t all that experienced, so he just kept them there until Arthur took over. He started gentle, just softly moving his lips against Merlin's but the kiss soon heated up and they were licking at each others’ tongues and biting bottom lips and Merlin had never known his body (or someone else’s for that matter) could ever feel this good.

“C’mon,” Arthur mumbled giddily against his lips, “There were some things in that letter that I really wanted to try,” and with a joyous laugh Merlin pulled Arthur over to the bed so that they could explore every inch of each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you liked it! If you see any mistakes please don't hesitate to tell me.  
> I really appreciate any comments and/or kudos.  
> Love you all so much :)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this. Kudos and comments/constructive criticism are greatly appreciated.  
> Thanks so much for reading!! <3


End file.
